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Scotland On Sunday / The Pink / Evening News
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Sporting Post / Evening Telegraph
Radio
/ Evening Times / Herald on Sunday
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On this page you can check the latest reporting errors made in your
favourite paper / radio / TV program about the glorious Boys in Blue.
Check the Sub-totals below for the example of the least "professional"
reporters in Scotland.
New Falsehoods and lies can be submitted here
or by e-mail to
webmaster@grange.demon.co.uk
Previous Awards are available for 1997-98 and
1996-97.
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A bastion of professional journalism as shown below. Managed 2nd place
in 1996-97 but walked away with the title
last year. Their WWW site is
here
May 24th- Charlie Nicholas on about
how Geoff enjoyed the Dundee game from his seat at McD - pity he was in
Florida at the time.
May 17th- 2 good ones today -
Motherwell are referred to as playing us next week and Del and Chief are
mixed up in the photos of the Killie match
April 8th- Cup semi-final build-up
has Kernaghan referred to as Saints skipper !!!
April 5th- Jim Weir returning from a
serious knee injury - someone better tell him they've moved his Achilles
then
March 15th- Bollan linked with the
incident leading to the Killie goal - it was Dods.
February 1st - Reports Del as being
booked at Parkhead when it was actually Phizzy.
January 21st - "Frozen out
hitman" Roddy Grant - this'll be the same player that has played in
most of the games this season then?
December 21st- Alex Camerons
in-depth report on the Motherwell match (ie Owen Coyle rabbiting on about
missing a penalty) was accompanied by a picture of Roddy Grant heading
home the winner. Pity anyone who was at the game saw him kick the ball
into the net - nowt like accurate reporting from OAP Alex.
November 2nd- "Jamie"
McQuillan scored the goal against the Pars apparently. They dont like him
do they?
September 24th- Report on the Celtic
game has Georigo taking the free kick leading to Saints winner - nope it
was Kane but they're only different colours and hairstyles.
September 19th- John "McQuilter".
Nope its McQuillan. Not like they'd ever misspell a Negri or Larsson.
September 12th- Miguel "Sumau"
? Nope its Simao. Not like they'd ever misspell a Negri or Larsson.
August 24th- "Winner"
league table has Saints having Played 2, Won 1, Drawn 1 and Lost 1? Wegie
Maths.
August 17th- "Paddy Connolly
has yet to score for Saints" - So who got the second last week then?
August 6th- Report on the
Livingstone deal has him signing as cover for "crocked" striker
Roddy Grant. That'll be crocked as in suspended will it?
July 21st- Wegie education at its
finest as the Retard says that if we sign Nash it'll double our Canadian
presence. So Dasovic + Xausa + Nash = 2 does it?
July 18th- Listings for their
Fantasy Premier League Competition has Jenko still down as a Saints
player.
Falsehood League Standings
My daily read so expect a few entries here. Especially as they tend to
give some coverage to the non-OF teams.
May 24th- Report on the Dundee game
had the score as 2-1 instead of 1-0
May 1st- Preview of the Aberdeen
game talks about "next weeks match against Killie" - nope its a
fortnight away.
April 12th- Rodger Baillies piece of
crap reporting says that the Saints fans were silent after cheering the 5
Nations win at the semi. Well I could hear them singing all through the
highlights.
April 5th- Jim Weir suffered from a
cruciate injury - nope it was his Achilles.
February 27th- Philip Scott was
added to the squad for Dens despite being in the squad for the last few
weeks.
January 20th - "Frozen out
hitman" Roddy Grant - this'll be the same player that has played in
most of the games this season then?
November 16th- Keith O'Halleron was
stretchered off at the weekend - phew lucky O'Halloran must be OK then.
October 27th- TV Guide has Saints
semi-final tie against the Jambos at McDiarmid - nope its Easter Road. -
you'd think they'd know better by now.
October 24th- TV Guide has Saints
semi-final tie against the Jambos at McDiarmid - nope its Easter Road.
August 20th- "McAnespie is yet
to feature in Saints first team" - so who started against Motherwell
and came off the bench against Killie then?
August 17th- "Kilmarnock
dominated the game" - so why was their keeper Man of the Match?
August 10th- Report on the Stranraer
match has Saints fans being pilloried for slagging off Georgio O'Boyle
then the reporter proceed to put him in the Nightmare Team of the Day!!!!
Thats Wegie Consistency for you.
August 6th- Report on the
Livingstone deal has him signing as cover for "crocked" striker
Roddy Grant. That'll be crocked as in suspended will it?
Falsehood League Standings
Not a regular read but always good for some errors.
October 18th- "Migel"
Simao and a difference in the Motherwell bookings tally (3 in the report
but only 2 in the Crim Count). Excellent stuff.
Another honest and fair paper. Excludes the page of McNee rants - he
has his own section (see here).
April 25th- Referee report of the
Celtic match makes mention of the Shot of the match from Dens !!?!?!
April 4th- "Frozen-out skipper
Jim Weir"? Try injured for the last year.
March 14th- Killie report said that
Durrant was the only player to have taken any long-range shots. I suppose
Blasters first half effort was all in the mind then?
January 3rd- Congratulations to
Phizzy for making Team of the Day - commiserations for now looking like
Jenko according to the photo!!!
October 18th- Goal of the match
against Motherwell refers to Georgios 40 yarder as being Saints 3rd in the
39th minute. Nope it was their 4th in the 85th minute.
August 16th- Who is "Nick
Dazovic" and does he play for Zaintz ?? Also if "Danny Griffin"
was being moved to the centre of defence where the hell has he been
playing the last 2 games?
August 9th- Three errors in the
footie supplement today. For the record, the Saints telephone number is
not 626961, the home strip has no white pinstripe and there is only one
Perth Railway Station (for some reason BR Leonard St. is near the ground).
Falsehood League Standings
Reasonable good coverage given that its a Scumdee Daily. Their WWW site
is here
with the Tele at www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk
March 3rd- Courier report on Dels
injury was accompanied by a picture of Nick Dasovic.
November 10th- Online version of the
"Tele" wittered on about Sturrock under a picture of St. Sandy -
blasphemy.
October 17th- Saints scorer Simeo ?
Nope its Simao - welcome to a Scumdee education.
August 24th- Saints "skipper
O'Boyle"? Nope it was Alan Main.
August 17th- Saints face Falkirk in
the League tomorrow night - nope wrong competition and divisions !!!!
July 21st- Errors galore in the
Elgin City report. The Elgin goal came from a Ferguson drop, McCluskey got
the 6th and ONeil the 7th (not the other way round) and it was Bollan not
Preston who set up the 6th
July 20th- Saints trialist at Rothes
credited as "Mark" Nash - nope its Martin.
Falsehood League Standings
Old Firm are Scottish Football so the rest don't matter - as you might
guess. Columnist Hugh Keevins has his own section
here. Their WWW site is
here
November 29th- Apparently Saints
went full-time at McD in 1989 and didn't go full-time till they were
promoted 4 years later - Strange I thought we went up only one year later?
November 1st- Miguel "Simo"???
September 13th- Report on the Pars
match says how Georgio had a great chance to level after 51 minutes. With
the score already 1-1 I can't see how he could level it? Still thats Wegie
maths.
August 16th- What does this paper
have against Del? Apparently Baker was booked in yesterdays game for a
foul on McQuillan not Del?
July 19th- Return to form as the
credit for the 4th goal in the Rothes friendly is given to Georgio instead
of John O'Neil.
Falsehood League Standings
Again, don't expect too much here - Gordon Bannerman and Danny Chalmers
usually know what they're talking about. Their WWW site is
here
March 26th- Listed Phizzys first
match as against Hibs - nope it was against the Jambos.
August 18th- Saints play "Kalkirk"
tonight - thanks to vhammer@hamwylie.demon.co.uk
July 17th- Early mistake for Danny
Chalmers as he lists Andy Whitefords debut as the Celtic game last
season - nope it was against the Pars 2 years ago.
Falsehood League Standings
Don't expect too much coverage unless we're playing the Old Firm.
July 31st- "Alan Main, Alan
Kernaghan and Mickey Weir are among the walking wounded." Thanks to
Steven Harker for the
falsehood.
Falsehood League Standings
With Saints in the Premier some coverage is guaranteed to be minimal as
last season - see here
for details.
September 3rd- I hadnt checked it
this season but apparently "An astonishing amount of errors from
Soccernet. According to them we have players such as Callum Davidson, "Leight
Jenkinson, Ian Ferguson and Steven Tosh. We also have Charlie Kind and
Robbie Grant" - I make that 6.
Falsehood League Standings
Mainly Radio Scotland. Excluding Chic the Pric (see here)
but including On/Off The Ball.
April 20th- Preview of the United
match said that we'd lost 3 of our last 4 matches - so beating TFOD
doesn't count any more?
April 17th- Radio 5 described Phizzy
as having been signed from the Pars. As if.
March 6th- Radio Scotland mentioned "Saints
manager Paul Sturrock" ....as if we'd have him back.
September 26th- Radio 5 said Rangers
beat us 1-0. Nope they beat the Pars 2-0. Thanks to
Phile Cowie
Falsehood League Standings
"Official" WWW site of the Scottish Footbal League. Good for
commentaries but some interesting things to say about Saints. Located
here.
August 18th- From the Falkirk v
Saints report :: "John McCullan blasted a shot from the edge of the
Falkirk box that Bairns keeper Nathers could only parry"
Falsehood League Standings
This could be a difficult one - do they actually have any listeners ?
Falsehood League Standings
Wegie-centric so dont expect too much.
April 25th- 2 from the Celtic report
- their fans did not fill 3 out of the 4 stands and Saints goal wasn't
their first shot of the game.
February 6th- Today's Herald
(Saturday): "Paul Sturrock last night secured the services of the
highly rated young striker John Paul McBride". Up-to-date Wegies as
ever.
July 21st- No Saints report but
Elgin City 0 Motherwell 6 listed in the scores - Strange, we beat Elgin
7-1 last night. Thanks to Jim for
the falsehood.
Falsehood League Standings
Including Extra Whine - again unlikely to feature much as Perth isn't
in Glasgow and they're too stingy to pay Sky for the rights to show the
matches. After missing out on the start of the season the STV show is back
with Jim "hes a right" Delahunt and Alan "Bankrupt"
McInally.
May 16th-Killie match shows
McCutcheon as a Saints sub instead of a Killie sub - they never even
showed our subs.
May 2nd- Speaks to Billy Davies
about Motherwells win over Saints yesterday - nope they beat Killie.
April 18th- Miguels header came off
the bar against Hearts? Nope it was a normal shot.
February 21st- Another one for the
pundits as Grahame Spiers went on about Judas' "return to Tayside"
- so where exactly had he been oh pretensious one?
February 7th- Pundit and "expert"
Jim Traynor wittered on about the win over the Arabs as putting us "3rd
or 4th" when we'd been there for ages. What an arse.
January 29th- A couple of good ones
on Extra Whine tonight - firstly for Delahunts benefit St. Sandy has not "bought
wisely" given that nobody has signed for the club since he took over
and for them to mention the U-21 game where "Saints beat Aberdeen
with the Dons winning 3-0" was surreal to say the least.
January 1st- Preview of the Dons
match has Georgio out for 2 weeks - wrong it's 2 months.
December 27th- Oor Erchie refers to
Del as an Irishman during the commentary on the Ibrox match.
Gary Panton
December 4th- Extra Whine League
Table has Celtic P 15, W 7, D 5 , L 4 - Wegie maths at its finest.
November 29th- League Cup Final
coverage has Saints possessing £50,000 ginger-haired striker
according to Archie called Nick Dasovic? Also Pa Broons punditry suggested
that Alan Kernaghan was Dods whilst towards the end the Ibrox-tinted specs
of Oor Erchie decided that Il Biscotti was Legend - 3 points overall.
November 15th- Who is "Andy"
Kernaghan? Or Daysovic ?
September 28th- Prick on Scotland
Today said the score on Saturday was 3-0 not 3-1
September 20th- Nathan Lowndes
referred to as Judas' last signing - so whos Miguel Simao then?
August 24th- Another 2 - Georgio is
not a midfielder and wasn't skipper at Dens.
August 12th- Coverage of the Livvo
transfer failure mentions that Roddy and Connolly are both hurt despite
both having featured in Saints teams in the last week.
August 7th- Teletext described
Stranraers Cup win over Saints last year - sorry guys it was 2 years ago.
July 31st- "Jim Weir and Alan
Main are among 6 Motherwell players ruled out of tomorrows match"
...as if !!
Falsehood League Standings
Including the Friday Old Firm preview. With rights to the goals from
the SPL this season expect more mistakes than before. Also includes the
BBC On-line service at news.bbc.co.uk
May 24th - Rob McLean on Reporting
Scotland mentions an upcoming report on Saints chances for the Fair Play
Spot - 24 hours after we gained automatic qualification.
April 24th - Gordon Smith strikers
again on Sportscene with "Miguel Simoa" - Dyslexic or what?
April 24th - Teletext mentions
Saints scorer v Sellik as Keith "O'Halleron"
April 20th - Teletext speaks of
Saints "French" striker Miguel Simao.
March 25th- Teletext reports Phizzy
as moving from St. Mirren to Sheff. Wed. Thanks to
hoggca@hotmail.com for that one.
March 6th- Teletext said we advanced
to the quarter finals - nope it's the semis.
February 26th- Interview of Scumdee
chief git Marr on Sportscene referred to Geoff Brown at "Muirton".
Thats a Hilltoon education for ye.
January 1st- Preview of the Dons
match has Georgio out for 2 weeks - wrong it's 2 months.
December 18th- Teletext preview of
the Well match referred to Roddy as being out until the New Year.
December 12th- Coverage of the
Dundee match has Gordon Smith going on about Saints defender "McQulken"
- again !!
September 19th- Willie Miller said
that Saints were down to 10 men when they scored their second. Obviously a
lie but it shows how much interest he took in the game.
August 19th- Totally wrong score for
the Falkirk match giving them the 1-0 win. Also called their keeper
Nathers
Falsehood League Standings
The Guardian version of Soccernet as found at
http://www.footballunlimited.co.uk
November 26th-Where to begin -
Davide Xausa (not Xhusa) is NOT a midfielder, Keyring is NOT a defender
and Nathan has scored more than 2 goals so far this season. Call it 4.
Falsehood League Standings
STV Sports Editor, ex-Sunday Mail Columnist and the nearest we've got
to a Scottish Jimmy Hill. Now writing for the News Of The World !!!!
Falsehood League Standings
Satellite TV and Teletext for the masses - known to come to McDiarmid
when a defeat is in the air. With the new Scottish Premiership on display
and ex-Scotsport presenter Jim "the Hun" White at the helm
expect a better showing from this mob this season.
April 3rd- Preview of the Rangers
match has an article on Georgio accompanied by an old picture of
McQuillan.
August 23rd- Five crackers from the
live coverage of the Scumdee win. (1) Pundit Robbo called Bollan Preston.
(2) Pundit Robbo called Del Griffin, (3) Dods referred to as a £40,000
buy - nope it was £140,000, (4) Roddy returning from injury - nope
suspension, (5) Danny nearly went to Derby last year - nope it was 3 years
ago. Thanks to Steven Burns.
Falsehood League Standings
Ibrox's most famous St. Mirren fan and living proof that you need
fuck-all knowledge to be a journo.
Falsehood League Standings
Edinburgh daily that will be lucky to mention Saints outside of the Old
Firm meetings this season. The Pink is the Embra equivalent of the
Sporting Post except it licks the bottoms of the Hibs and Hearts and
includes a lot more Rugger Bugger stories. Their WWW site is
here
May 16th- Photo of Stuart McCluskey
labelled at John McQ at the Killie match
April 21st - Match report from
Tannadice mentions Saints "French" striker Miguel Simao.
April 11th- Neil McLennan of the
Scotsman gets it wrong in the semi-final program. Saints last Scottish Cup
semi was 1992 not 1989.
March 14th- Bollan again linked with
the incident leading to the Killie goal - it was Dods but given the rest
of Paul Forsyth's report such crap shouldn't be surprising.
February 7th- Apparently if Bollan
had got a second goal yesterday making his total 3 he would be Saints top
goalscorer - so 3 is now greater than 4 is it?
November 30th- Front page : "No
dancing in the streets of St. Johnstone as Rangers blah blah blah..."
October 28th- Coverage of the League
Cup Semi contains the immortal "There was a robust trip by Kernaghan
on Simao, and he collected a yellow card for his effort." Even Willie
Young isn't that stupid.
September 9th- Scotsman report on
the Hibs match has Kane impersonating Nathan Lowndes.
August 24th- More Edinburgh Maths
with Dods fee listed as £75,000 in the Scotsman report of the Scumdee
match.
August 17th- The Darren Dods fee is
listed as being £140,000, double the original Saints offer. Which the
Edinburgh-based paper had listed as a "derisory" £45,000.
Thats Auld Reekie Maths for you.
July 19th- Scotland on Sunday
credited the 4th goal in the Rothes friendly is given to Georgio instead
of John O'Neil. Thanks to
Gary Panton for
the falsehood.
Falsehood League Standings
Saintees everywhere's favourite ex-Scotsman journalist. Amazing tunnel
vision since based in Embra he seems incapable of dealing with anything
other than the Wegie Unwashed. New for this year since hes bound to cover
some Saints games. Now writing for the Sunday Mason as the replacement for
McNee (some honour eh).
April 4th- Right, now we know this
idiot is getting senile but his article in todays Mail ahead of the
Rangers match defies belief. "St. Johnstone have been the biggest
TV turn-off since Eldorado. On four times, one goal scored, NO wins! But
the money's good. They'll make £165,000 from Sky for tonight's game
with Ranges and the Scottish Cup tie. Thats big box-office for flops".
Keevins has had a grudge against Sandy Clark and Saints for years. Now
apart from the fact that we beat Dundee (in the 3 Sky games not 4), we
also won a League Cup semi and put on a damn good show in the final - both
live on STV. Arse. Call it 3 points. Personally I think this is worth a
letter to the editor.
Falsehood League Standings
April 21st- Report on the United
game refers to Saints keeper "Alan Mean" ????
March 14th- Report on the Killie
game has Bollan colliding with Main - nope it was Darren Dods
February 28th- Two crackers in the
Scumdee report - Legend is apparently looking to move to the English
Premiership and McQ cleared off the line for Scumdee from a Grant header
(it was the Scumdee no 2 from a Father Dougal header). 3 points overall.
Thanks to Jim Eccleston
for these.
Falsehood League Standings
May 2nd- Preview of the OF War has
Pope as a possible TFOE sub - he's only been with Saints for 2 months !!!
March 7th- Two good ones in the
report on the Motherwell match. Firstly the main on-line page had the
score as 0-0 instead of a 2-0 win for Saints. Then the second goal said
Miguel was set up by a pass from McQ - nope it was O'Halloran.
Falsehood League Standings
September 27th- Report on the Arabs
match had Danny conceding the penalty when it was actually McCluskey.
Thanks to vhammer@hamwylie.demon.co.uk
July 30th- Season preview details
Georgio as player to watch but uses a picture of John McQuillan instead.
Thanks to Steven Burns
for the falsehood.
Falsehood League Standings
Not a regular read and probably qualifies for a discount given that its
Manchester based but what the hell. Their WWW site is
here
Falsehood League Standings
As found at
http://www.sporting-life.com/soccer/scotspremteams/stjohnstone.html
- normally a fairly accurate site.
May 14th- Preview of the Killie game
says one of the main clashes will be Veraillev Kernaghan - given he's not
playing it's pretty unlikely.
April 5th- Keyring enjoyed his "first
start" against Rangers last night - I don't think so.
November 27th- Picture of Kane
captioned as Nathan - not that they look much different
September 17th- For some reason Arab
team news is listed under Saints stuff - sorry but Judas has gone.
September 4th- In the wake of the
Sturrock resignation the following errors. He took over in Nov 93 not
March 94. Saints were 3 not 2 seasons in the 1st Division.
Falsehood League Standings
Not a regular read. Don't expect too much coverage of Saints either.
Falsehood League Standings
May 23rd- Channel 5 strikes with "they'll
be dancing in the streets of St. Johnstone tonight"
April 21st- Press and Journal again
had the headline "Griffin Off" for the Tannadice match - nope it
was Nathan.
February 7th- Aberdeen Press &
Journal reported that "Saints had secured a vital 3 points in their
quest to remain in the Premier League" after Saints beat the Arabs to
stay 4th !!!!
Falsehood League Standings