Temple Of Saints - Paddy's Back !!!!

Scottish Premier League - 28/10/2000

Obviously-in-crisis Jambos 0 Saints 3 League Table Here

Team: Main,Sylla,Blaster,Dods,Kernaghan,Weir,Dasovic,Kane,Connolly, Parker, Evers
Subs: Cuthbert,McCulloch,JR,Tommy,Pope

It's just getting better isn't it? Not the best performance by any means and yet again the media will be full of how the opposition is in crisis but Saints are playing full of confidence and with plenty of style and fully deserved to win by more than the score suggests. And if Hearts think that after shoving the away fans into that deathtrap of a main stand (complete with restricted views / no room and crap facilities) they think they'll get any sympathy they're badly mistaken.

No changes to the team and Marco made a return to the bench in place of Forsyth / Malcolm. For the home side the legendary Balding Perm that is Durie played up front.

The opening minutes were fairly even although Saints looked a tad nervous on the ball with the midfield reluctant to push forward and Paddy and Kiegan struggling to reach any of the long balls (with James marking Kiegan that wasn't much of a surprise really). The Gorgie Gits had a couple of shots go wide and whilst it wasn't too great that they had the room to shoot, Jesus wasn't troubled in goal.

Saints first chance came after 10 minutes when a Jambo defender was dispossessed by Paddy in his own box. Paddy took the ball and shot but only to see the ball go across the goalmouth. Kiegan got to the rebound but Niemi saved. Just after that the Balding Perm must have had a psychic prediction and decided to pick up a thigh strain and leave the park. Still three grand for 10 minutes work isn't too bad - and they wonder why Hearts are in crisis. Anyway the Balding Perm was replaced by "Elbows" Flogel.

Not that it made too much difference to the game with almost a total lack of action. Saints were getting their share of possession but were struggling to piece together any attacks and when they did get forward there wasn't enough in the box to cause any real problems. At the other end Main had to make a couple of saves but with no real danger the game looking destined to be goalless. We had our chances though. A foul on MoMo on the half hour saw Kane take the free kick. A short pass to Blaster who shot well only to see Niemi save.

Then a cracking move from Paddy, Evers and Parker saw the ball returned to Paddy who shot into the net only to be ruled off for offside.

Second-half started though and Saints decided to stop pissing about. 2 minutes gone and the ball comes to Kiegan in the box. James decides to bring him down in front of the ref and whilst it might have been a soft one there was no hesitation from the man in the middle. Up steps Kiegan the Cool and blasts the ball into the net - 1-0 Saints, we all start singing and the home support turn on the board and manager - great stuff.

After that Saints started to turn on the style - the midfield might have had an off day in terms of some of the first touches on the ball but the Gorgie Gits were running scared now. Kiegan got the ball to the byeline and sent a wicked low cross into the box - Paddy got to it but his turn and shot were sent over by Niemi. Kane took the corner and Niemi made another good block from a Weir header - if that had gone in Cap'n Jim might have really gotten fired up.

Still we didn't have long to wait and the 2nd goal just after the hour mark was a cracker. Kiegan gets the ball on the left and squares it to Paddy running into the middle. He beats 3 Jambos before letting rip with a looping shot from 25 yards out which goes over Niemi. In days gone by it would have gone over the bar as well but the Gods are smiling on Paddy and the ball went into the net and gave us all a chance to remember his surname again.

By now the home support were drifting away and some of the so-called "best supporters in the land" couldn't wait to dump their scarves on the pitch. Their mood wasn't helped when Mumblin' Jim took off Banjo and put on Locke instead - wonderful attacking policy that as the Saints fans let rip with "We Want Six". Meanwhile on the park, Main made a good save from Pressley but with Saints in control the game was opening up. MoMo was struggling a bit on the right but still seemed to take the piss out of the home side at every opportunity with some nice linking play with Kane and Kiegan.

With 10 minutes to go Kiegan nearly made it 3 when Niemi came off his line to try and beat him - Kiegan shot but the ball was blocked. Main still had to make a couple of saves and whilst MoMo looked done it was Kiegan who went off to be replaced by Tommy.

Then in the final minute with the Jambos up the park looking for a consolation, Saints beat the offside trap and Paddy the Punisher broke up the field and took his time to shoot past the onrushing Niemi. 3-0 Saints and the home support vanishes quicker than Hearts bank deposits !!!!! MoM is hard to choose but it has to go to Paddy the Punisher - he's had his fair share of stick from me recently but he scored two great goals today and ran his arse off on the park. Mentions too for Kane and Weir who both seemed to enjoy their opponents misfortunes.

As for the opposition - aw who gives a fuck they'll be in the first division next year anyway...especially with that crap ground.

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